Laura Fenton’s The Little Book of Living Small, is a required reading for anyone who wants to live happily forever outside the confines of a McMansion. Reading this book was like re-discovering minimalism, was like those days in the monastery and having the environment to be content, is like how one feels after a good spring clean, is like getting over an addiction and being free, is like waking up in the morning on a campground and smiling to yourself for no reason, is like a night when you sit on your couch hugging your puppy and just be, is like serendipitously glancing upon a night sky full of stars and pausing to take it in, going to an eulogy and realizing what is important in life, like marrying your partner and to know that you are on a pathway to figure this life out with the right companion on your side, … A weight lifted, that is the impact this book had on me. It is “permission” to feel good about living small. ( Just like how wabi sabi teaches you to not be ashamed of old worn out things. ) After time wasted obsessing over a housing upgrade, I stopped and settled in. The book has some good philosophy and the subsequent information for anyone pursuing this path of living with less. Reading this book helped me re-caliber my thinking on what my house should be, and to see a small house as a long term home for us. I have been coming up with some more commandments for myself :

1. A house is much more about filling a space with good ideas than it is about comforts and aesthetic. Abolish patriarchy. Adopt permaculture.

2. House becomes a home when we stop interior designing and start living

3. A house is for the ones who live in it full time. Not for guests who might visit. Not for the one party we throw every month. Not for a design exercise for the brain muscles. Not for instagram. Not for blog. Not for any other purpose beyond it being our nest.

4. Our happiness is not tied to a glossier house.

5. NO HOUSE is supposed to RESEMBLE ANOTHER. No house need be inspired by another or live up to another or be like another. You do your unique you. Stop peer pressure in its tracks by limiting time spent on social media. Fear of missing out on inspiration and ideas ? Reframe it : Joy of missing out on the constant frenzy of “better”. Joy of not grazing stuff that can be consumed. Joy of being content.

6. Time is luxury. Being able to calmly move through the world at my own pace, is a luxury. I used to get irritated and fixated on scratching the itches that crossed my mind. Buddhist practices like vipassana and wabi sabi are helping me control my impulses. When I do take on the project, I want to do it well. Till then, self it for the future. Save the energy, time, attention and money until it’s time to take the plunge.

7. Entire house should be a cozy space. There is a popular lounger chair called the womb chair whose name I like more than the actual chair. Every small space has the potential to be womb-like and cozy.

8. Solar panels on roof, rainwater management and compost are the essentials.

9. A yard is measured by the biodiversity it supports. If it’s mostly lawn and a few humans lounging for 45 minutes a week (national average), it’s space wasted after being violently taken from a once-forest.

10. A garden is no garden unless it resembles the ecosystem it is located in. Build for the bees, insects, birds, worms, bacteria, small animals, native plants, wild weeds, ground cover, diversity of plants, … first. Grow food for the humans next. Aesthetics later. Monoculture industrial gardens and modernist mindless designs that force life into recognizable shapes do not belong in my home.

11. Lighting is my first priority when making the inside of a house more livable. Proper insulation is next. The rest, we can slowly do.

12. The opposite of over-designed, over-thought and overdone.

13. No to beige on beige on beige.

14. Keep the kitchen simple. Do not get carried away by appliances. No need to cook a zillion things and need equipment that requires it’s own share of housing. It is okay if I don’t make dosa or pizza or air fried chicken or wok tossed fried rice or grilled meat. Keep the suppers simple and nourishing. Don’t make food that requires a woman to be chained to the stove for extended periods of time.

15. Stay away from the domestic goddesses of the internet with money wands who constantly renovate like they are stuck in a loop. Escape the loop by not stepping into it.

16. Get my partner more involved. He is currently a pillion rider with me driving our needs and making the decisions. There has to be equality.

17. Make money go long way. How long ? Beyond my own use and stay. Let everything have the potential to become vintage item of a certain quality. Do without till such item can be afforded.

18. Do not start buying and decorating right away. Live in a space first with minimum possible, get a feel of it, and then start making it yours.

19. Permaculture is what makes a good animal of us in our ecosystem. Learn the philosophy and start with applying it at home. Start with #1 : Stop, Look, Listen.

I want to read people write personal essays about their homes. I want to know your process and how you evolved over time. I want to know your philosophy of nesting. I want to know how you grew content and happy with what they have. I want to hear about the long pauses one takes before improving a house. I want to know about design rules and trends you fought off in your head, to take a chance at creating something you envisioned. I want to sit in on conversations about a 360 degree change of mind in ones design process. I want to know your stories, how ever unrelatable they are. Oddly enough, I also want to hear people ramble about their chairs or tables and light fixtures. I want to hear about pet-peeves that intersect with the McMansions. I want to read an essay on love of a bookshelf or a cozy corner. “For the love of a window”, is a perfectly acceptable blog post title for an essay. I am recording my evolution here, for anyone who wants to read what I wish I could read about your homemaking process.